This Latino couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although he was very much in love,couldn't wait to go into town and party with his old buddies, so he said to his wife:
"Preciosa, I'll be right back"
"Where are you going papi chulo? asked the wife.
"I'm going to the bar, Mamasita. I'm going to have a beer."
The wife says to him, "You want a beer, mi amor?"
Then she opens the door to the refrigerator and shows him 25 different kinds of beer brands from 12 different countries:
"Mira papi, Germany, Holland, Japan, India"
The husband doesn't know what to do, and the only thing that he can think of saying is:
"Yes mi mujer linda.... but the bar... you know.... the frozen glass...."
He didn't finish the sentence, when the wife interrupts him by saying, "You want a frozen glass, mi precioso?" She takes a huge beer mug out of the freezer so frozen that she was getting chills holding it.
The husband, looking a bit pale says: "Yes, mi dulce, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious....I won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise, OK?"
"You want hors d'oeuvres, cariño...?" She opens the oven and takes out 15 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in a blanket, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.
"But querida.....at the bar....you know....the swearing....the dirty words and all that"
"You want dirty words, mi macho hombre.....HERE, TOMA TU PINCHE CERVEZA IN YOUR FROZEN F **** COPA AND COMETE TUS PINCHE SNACKS, PORQUE YOU AREN'T GOING ANYWHERE!!!!! GOT IT, PENDEJO......?!?!?!?"