Knock me out...

It's a new year!  Yay!   I'm really hoping things are not as heartbreaking as last year (deaths, breakups, etc.).  Praying for breakthroughs and resolution to unknown circumstances.   Although I have much to look forward to (Israel trip in April especially!), I'm really hoping for hope. 

The Ex and I spoke recently and we basically agreed that we need to treat each other with love like a brother and sister.  We also agreed that although we do not want to shut the door on "us," now is not the time.   All that is good, but then Christmas Eve he came over and we spent time together (it was innocent, but probably still not a great idea).  Even worse, New Year's Eve we crossed a little bit of a line when, at the stroke of Midnight, we embraced and a little, baby kiss was involved (mostly by me, but yeah).   Ay!   Those types of no-nos can't happen.  This is going to be very hard.

I know that we are in limbo right now and I also know that it's a time to wait on the Lord.  I'm back to feeling peace about it, but I'm also asking God to put me to sleep to this.  In fact, I want Him to put me to sleep to my love life altogether.   I know it is not what I need to be dwelling on.  The fact is that God asked me to be single and part of being single is using that time wisely to serve Him.   Not only has He given me the Friday night group (which is growing!!), but He is asking me to serve in other places.  I see that He wants all of me right now. 

So, Lord, knock me out.  

Genesis 2:20-22
"But for Adam no suitable helper was found. ²¹ So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. ²² Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man."

Whether the Ex or some other guy is supposed to be my husband one day, we both need to be asleep to the situation and each other before God can bring us to each other.  The best way for me to put it to bed is to be busy about the Lord's business.